The Email I just sent to dustin...

Hey just writing you an email to say hi, and I have a lot I want to talk about, but I really don't know how to talk about it over the phone without feeling stupid.. I feel like I'm making all the effort here to talk to you, to arrange for us to see each other, and if you even cared about me a little bit, I think you would make more of an effort.. Where do you exactly want "us" to go? Do you just see us talking on the phone, being friends or do you want more? Honestly, I don't know what I want because If we were to get back together I do not want it like last time at all.... I want to spend time with you, we need to get to re-know each other, because we have been apart just as long as we were together, you need to earn your trust back, because in all honesty, I have no idea if you cheated on me.. Trust is an important issue in relationships, communication is too, but you just telling me that you didn't cheat, doesn't "reassure" my conscience... I want to have open, honest communication, and I think If I came there this early, it would mix feelings for the both of us, even though I do need to get away from all this stress, I just don't want to confuse things for the both of us, but I do want to see you, because seeing you would be the best way we could talk about this.. So providing we talk still talk, I want to come see you In March, and see where we go from there, but I do still want to talk to you EVERYDAY.. I should NOT have to call you to talk first, call me once in a while.. Send me a card, if you have feelings, do something to show me I'm not wasting my time... Ya, I have a hard time telling you this on the phone, so I figured email would be better... So ya once ya read this give me a call or something.. So we can talk, if you want to!

Heather..

So there ya have it, the email I just sent to dustin, I was going to go there this next friday, but I don't want to rush/confuse things worse than they already are.. Because I know I am confused. Dustin must have ESP, because he calls when I'm always writing about him.. Its weird... Anyways. I'm rather bored, I want to do something tonight, Not sure what I am going to do yet.. I will probably just sit at home and watch movies.. Go to bed early like I did last night, last night I was in bed by 10.. It felt great.. I suppose, I'm gonna watch a movie...

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